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...but love them for now looking back as a young adult. I wanted “cool parents,” parents that my friends wanted to hang out with on weekends, or parents that when they came to my events everyone wanted as their parents. My parents, were definitely not those parents. They were “responsible parents” and “mean parents” and “strict parents.”
One of my favorite coaches always said “We aren’t raising softball players; we’re raising young women,” and that’s exactly what my parents did.
One of my favorite coaches always said “We aren’t raising softball players; we’re raising young women,” and that’s exactly what my parents did.
1. “If your homework isn’t done you will sit here and miss practice until it is!” This threat came on a weekly, and sometimes daily basis throughout my young life. It took ONE time for my homework to not be done and my butt sat at the kitchen table all night and finished it while my sister got to go to practice. It never happened again in my 17 years of playing softball. My homework was done, period.
2. “I’m not the one getting recruited, why would I respond to your emails from college coaches?” At 15, I wanted to go to the football games and out with my friends, responding to a bunch of emails sounded like a drag compared to 15-year-old things. Interacting with college coaches myself helped me create an opinion of them and their schools that were completely my own and were less influenced by my parents.
3. Every Friday, without fail, I packed my own bag before we left for a tournament. If I forgot something, it was MY fault. You better bet a lot of money that I checked and rechecked that bag every weekend for my uniforms and any other essentials. Now when I travel, packing is a breeze with all the practice I had growing up!
4. Curfews. GASP. They were constant, and always earlier on game nights. Weekends that my teammates were up at all hours of the night running the halls of the hotel? My butt was in bed watching TV with an early bed time. I always appreciated it when I was pitching game #3 the following day.
5. Whenever I was traveling with my team in college I was always expected to send a text when we left and arrived safely. I thought it was so lame and overbearing that my parents wanted to “constantly know where I was and what I was doing.” It’s because they cared, and still do care. (because we still all do it!) My boyfriend now jokes that now I expect him do it when he travels too.
6. They harped on physical therapy CONSTANTLY, and made extra appointments for me throughout the week to work with my physical therapists during season. It made for faster recoveries and allowed me to push myself harder during season through pain when I needed to.
7. I had a problem? I was the one who had to address it with my coach. I was bitter, but it forced me to learn how to communicate and talk about my problems with my superiors. I also learned how to pick my battles and decide what was really important enough to talk about or if I could change something I was doing to solve the problem.
8. They told me what I needed to hear, not necessarily what I wanted to hear. (Like that I was never going to pitch at Alabama!) They were hard on me - no one was harder on me than they were. It taught me how to have crazy high expectations for myself.
9. When I was rehabbing I was at every single practice and game, even though I couldn’t participate on the field. I learned more about the game from the sidelines than I ever thought I would. I learned how to be a better teammate, how to call pitches, how to teach and mentor, how to steal signs, how to read a defense, the list goes on and on. (Shout out to former coach Dani Schenone on this one for mentoring me!)
10. Optional practices were not optional. The word optional did not exist in our household growing up. When we signed up for a team, whether it was softball or any other sport, we were at every single practice. This made the adjustment to college ball much more simple as the commitment level increased.
2. “I’m not the one getting recruited, why would I respond to your emails from college coaches?” At 15, I wanted to go to the football games and out with my friends, responding to a bunch of emails sounded like a drag compared to 15-year-old things. Interacting with college coaches myself helped me create an opinion of them and their schools that were completely my own and were less influenced by my parents.
3. Every Friday, without fail, I packed my own bag before we left for a tournament. If I forgot something, it was MY fault. You better bet a lot of money that I checked and rechecked that bag every weekend for my uniforms and any other essentials. Now when I travel, packing is a breeze with all the practice I had growing up!
4. Curfews. GASP. They were constant, and always earlier on game nights. Weekends that my teammates were up at all hours of the night running the halls of the hotel? My butt was in bed watching TV with an early bed time. I always appreciated it when I was pitching game #3 the following day.
5. Whenever I was traveling with my team in college I was always expected to send a text when we left and arrived safely. I thought it was so lame and overbearing that my parents wanted to “constantly know where I was and what I was doing.” It’s because they cared, and still do care. (because we still all do it!) My boyfriend now jokes that now I expect him do it when he travels too.
6. They harped on physical therapy CONSTANTLY, and made extra appointments for me throughout the week to work with my physical therapists during season. It made for faster recoveries and allowed me to push myself harder during season through pain when I needed to.
7. I had a problem? I was the one who had to address it with my coach. I was bitter, but it forced me to learn how to communicate and talk about my problems with my superiors. I also learned how to pick my battles and decide what was really important enough to talk about or if I could change something I was doing to solve the problem.
8. They told me what I needed to hear, not necessarily what I wanted to hear. (Like that I was never going to pitch at Alabama!) They were hard on me - no one was harder on me than they were. It taught me how to have crazy high expectations for myself.
9. When I was rehabbing I was at every single practice and game, even though I couldn’t participate on the field. I learned more about the game from the sidelines than I ever thought I would. I learned how to be a better teammate, how to call pitches, how to teach and mentor, how to steal signs, how to read a defense, the list goes on and on. (Shout out to former coach Dani Schenone on this one for mentoring me!)
10. Optional practices were not optional. The word optional did not exist in our household growing up. When we signed up for a team, whether it was softball or any other sport, we were at every single practice. This made the adjustment to college ball much more simple as the commitment level increased.
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I’ve been trying to write this blog for about a week now, and here it is Friday night before graduation and I’m still struggling to put into words how I feel. In the 2.5 years I’ve spent in Shippensburg it has not only become a place that I can call home with ease, but also the place where I (finally) figured out what I’m supposed to do with my life. When I first got to Shippensburg I was struggling with who I was, and what I wanted. I choose Shippensburg University not only for the softball team, but for the education department. I wanted a school where I would learn how to be the best in my field. Little did I know, that my field was going to quickly change. I made a list of all the things I learned here through my interaction with pitchers and the softball community, but I couldn’t find the words to put it into a letter so instead here is my list.
1. Everything happens for a reason. I never imagined that another shoulder injury would be one of the best things that has ever happened to me. By not being able to play the game, it allowed me to share it in a whole new way.
2. My definition of success quickly changed. It went from my own big game wins and stats to correct snaps and innings without walks. I would give up so many of my own championships and big games to see my pitchers succeed, which is something I wasn’t sure I would ever feel.
3. I learned how to be a role model, and support girls who were going through things that I remember going through oh so well. There were some pitching lessons that we really only focused on pitching for a small part of them. Between trouble with teachers, bullies, boys, family, and too many other situations to list how can we really focus on just pitching? I learned how to let lessons become an outlet for my pitchers who were struggling a little bit outside of softball, while still focusing on pitching and mechanics.
4. What it means to put your name on something. For the first time in my life I was saying “Hey, I think I’m good at this and would love to teach your daughter.” This was a concept that was beyond scary at first, but now I love it. I love being able to support parents and pitchers with a specialty that I love.
5. What it truly means to give support. I never imagined in giving “one hour pitching lessons” I would end up doing the things I did. My friends laughed at me while we hung out on weekends because I was constantly stepping outside to take calls or texting with pitchers, parents, and coaches about how weekends were going. I ended up spending many weekends at random ball fields all over Pennsylvania and Maryland to watch my pitchers. I babysat for parents in a pinch, I curled hair for homecoming, and hosted study sessions with some of my older pitchers. I never truly understood how invested I would be.
6. I am a better daughter, sister, friend, coworker, coach and all around better person because of the girls I have come to know and love through softball. The energy and enthusiasm that I see every day in the pitchers I work with genuinely makes me want to take that same energy and enthusiasm into other aspects of my life.
7. I came to the realization that this is what I want to do for the rest of my life. I spent my entire days looking forward to coaching softball each evening. I found a career that I can take my passion for softball and combine it with my love of teaching. While helping young pitchers learn to believe in themselves I somewhere along the way started to believe in myself again.
I never imagined saying more goodbyes than I can count over the past six months as pitchers find someone new to continue to help them grow. I am so thankful that I could play a small part in the softball community here in Southern Pennsylvania. The lessons that I have learned in the past years here will stay with me for the rest of my career. Shippensburg is the place I found my calling, and for that I will be forever thankful. I cannot wait to watch the pitchers I have worked with continue to grow into not only the athletes I know they can be, but also the amazing young women I have come to know and love here.
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Jock…Gym Class Hero…Gym Rat…the stereotypes thrown at athletes are endless, especially in the world of female sports. I can remember being a freshman in high school pitching for the varsity team, and the baseball team called me “testosterone.” (I should point out that our record was much better than theirs that year!) Athletes get a bad reputation and are often portrayed poorly in the media, yet generally these athletes in the media are the exception rather than the rule. Obviously, as many of you are raising amazing young women that I have been fortunate enough to work with who will continue to break stereotypes.
Where does this stereotyping stop? It stops when those of us who do the right thing and are proud of what we accomplish on and off the field step up and say something. Stand up for your daughter and female athletes when someone sends a shot our way. Your daughter should be proud of who she is and what she has accomplished. When people question our choices to play sports and dedicate our lives to the craziness of traveling every summer and practicing almost year round remind them of the life lessons that your daughter learns.
“I saw both of my daughters deal with stereotypes in different ways as they grew up. There were moments in each of their careers when I questioned what was best for them and if this really was the right path for them and our family. Years later, I am thankful for the paths they each took. Playing collegiate softball helped shape each of them into the successful young women they are today.”
- Laurie Murphy (also known as my awesome mom who
raised two softball crazed & just plain crazy daughters)
If your daughter chooses to take her game to the next level, there are SO MANY doors that are opened for her. Participating in college athletics should be considered a positive experience. The balance that student athletes maintain between academics and athletics not only helps them to succeed but also prepares them for the future.
Why I would want my (hypothetical!) daughter to participate in college athletics
1. A Huge Support System: On average a softball team has 20 players, and maybe 4 of those players are freshmen. This gives those 4 freshmen 16 people automatically who have been in their shoes as well. Most programs have required academic meetings with coaches or study halls to be sure that student athletes are also staying on top of their academics. Many programs have added academic support such as tutors and advisors that have worked with athletes for years.
2. High Expectations: Whether it comes in the form of NCAA Eligibility Rules, a Team Contract, or keeping up with classroom with a crazy schedule your daughter has been given expectations much higher than the general student population. She is expected to keep up with her classes or there will be consequences in athletics as well.
3. Time Management: Sometimes, the less time you have, the better you are at managing it. By having commitments outside of class your daughter will learn (if she hasn’t already!) how she “operates” the best and when she needs to do what. For me, it was always getting up early in the morning to do my homework and studying before I went to class and practice because by the time I was done with practice all I wanted was food and sleep! My teammates all managed their time differently, but they did what worked for them. As an adult, the time management skills I developed as an athlete help me at work more than I ever imagined they could.
4. Networking and her Future: Two words: resume builder. Employers don’t see “athlete” on a resume, they see “responsible, time management, respectful, dedicated, gritty, problem solver, mentally tough….” and the list goes on. On top of this, the alumni networking that occurs when you graduate as an athlete from an institution is huge. You automatically have something in common with thousands of professionals who graduated from the same school you did!
5. Lifelong Fitness: No “freshman fifteen!” just kidding…but seriously, the exercise and nutrition habits that I developed as a college athlete are now second nature to me as an adult. The gym has become an outlet after a long day now that I no longer have practice for that, and eating healthy isn’t something I need to think about on a daily basis anymore.
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“I wouldn’t be as successful as I was in college athletics if I didn’t have the support of my parents, teammates, and coaches. My teammates determination inspired my determination. My coach would read quotes that would help to put everything into perspective and refocus my energy on school and field hockey.
- Miranda Wallace, Shippensburg Unv. Field Hockey (Senior, 2016 DII Champions)
“One way that really helps me balance academics and athletics is budgeting the time I’m going to spend on each the night before. That way when I say I’m going to pitch or workout after my class, I don’t really have an excuse. I also like to do everything the night before I start studying or doing homework, so it’s easier for me to go hit or pitch while I’m still out and about.”
- Shannon Tierney, Rhodes College Softball (Freshman)
“Time management is key. Having a daily, weekly, and monthly schedule helped to give me an idea of what the short term and long term looked like without getting overwhelmed. That way I could also stay on top of my class work, play softball, and still have time to relax at the end of the day - having time to unwind is important too!
- Taylor Dorman, Shippensburg Unv. Softball (Junior)
“I’ve been a student-athlete for as long as I can remember so I don’t really know any different. School work always comes first then practice. A normal day is school, homework, practice, then bed.”
- Lexi Alleman, Shippensburg High School Softball/Field Hockey (Sophomore)
“The most important factor in balancing athletic participation with academics is time management. The athletes that do the best job of staying ahead of their studies and getting their work done early are the ones who tend to have the best ability to balance the two.”
- Jeremy Phelps, Rhodes College Assistant Men’s Lacrosse Coach
Where does this stereotyping stop? It stops when those of us who do the right thing and are proud of what we accomplish on and off the field step up and say something. Stand up for your daughter and female athletes when someone sends a shot our way. Your daughter should be proud of who she is and what she has accomplished. When people question our choices to play sports and dedicate our lives to the craziness of traveling every summer and practicing almost year round remind them of the life lessons that your daughter learns.
“I saw both of my daughters deal with stereotypes in different ways as they grew up. There were moments in each of their careers when I questioned what was best for them and if this really was the right path for them and our family. Years later, I am thankful for the paths they each took. Playing collegiate softball helped shape each of them into the successful young women they are today.”
- Laurie Murphy (also known as my awesome mom who
raised two softball crazed & just plain crazy daughters)
If your daughter chooses to take her game to the next level, there are SO MANY doors that are opened for her. Participating in college athletics should be considered a positive experience. The balance that student athletes maintain between academics and athletics not only helps them to succeed but also prepares them for the future.
Why I would want my (hypothetical!) daughter to participate in college athletics
1. A Huge Support System: On average a softball team has 20 players, and maybe 4 of those players are freshmen. This gives those 4 freshmen 16 people automatically who have been in their shoes as well. Most programs have required academic meetings with coaches or study halls to be sure that student athletes are also staying on top of their academics. Many programs have added academic support such as tutors and advisors that have worked with athletes for years.
2. High Expectations: Whether it comes in the form of NCAA Eligibility Rules, a Team Contract, or keeping up with classroom with a crazy schedule your daughter has been given expectations much higher than the general student population. She is expected to keep up with her classes or there will be consequences in athletics as well.
3. Time Management: Sometimes, the less time you have, the better you are at managing it. By having commitments outside of class your daughter will learn (if she hasn’t already!) how she “operates” the best and when she needs to do what. For me, it was always getting up early in the morning to do my homework and studying before I went to class and practice because by the time I was done with practice all I wanted was food and sleep! My teammates all managed their time differently, but they did what worked for them. As an adult, the time management skills I developed as an athlete help me at work more than I ever imagined they could.
4. Networking and her Future: Two words: resume builder. Employers don’t see “athlete” on a resume, they see “responsible, time management, respectful, dedicated, gritty, problem solver, mentally tough….” and the list goes on. On top of this, the alumni networking that occurs when you graduate as an athlete from an institution is huge. You automatically have something in common with thousands of professionals who graduated from the same school you did!
5. Lifelong Fitness: No “freshman fifteen!” just kidding…but seriously, the exercise and nutrition habits that I developed as a college athlete are now second nature to me as an adult. The gym has become an outlet after a long day now that I no longer have practice for that, and eating healthy isn’t something I need to think about on a daily basis anymore.
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“I wouldn’t be as successful as I was in college athletics if I didn’t have the support of my parents, teammates, and coaches. My teammates determination inspired my determination. My coach would read quotes that would help to put everything into perspective and refocus my energy on school and field hockey.
- Miranda Wallace, Shippensburg Unv. Field Hockey (Senior, 2016 DII Champions)
“One way that really helps me balance academics and athletics is budgeting the time I’m going to spend on each the night before. That way when I say I’m going to pitch or workout after my class, I don’t really have an excuse. I also like to do everything the night before I start studying or doing homework, so it’s easier for me to go hit or pitch while I’m still out and about.”
- Shannon Tierney, Rhodes College Softball (Freshman)
“Time management is key. Having a daily, weekly, and monthly schedule helped to give me an idea of what the short term and long term looked like without getting overwhelmed. That way I could also stay on top of my class work, play softball, and still have time to relax at the end of the day - having time to unwind is important too!
- Taylor Dorman, Shippensburg Unv. Softball (Junior)
“I’ve been a student-athlete for as long as I can remember so I don’t really know any different. School work always comes first then practice. A normal day is school, homework, practice, then bed.”
- Lexi Alleman, Shippensburg High School Softball/Field Hockey (Sophomore)
“The most important factor in balancing athletic participation with academics is time management. The athletes that do the best job of staying ahead of their studies and getting their work done early are the ones who tend to have the best ability to balance the two.”
- Jeremy Phelps, Rhodes College Assistant Men’s Lacrosse Coach
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On Monday morning I flew back to PA from a great last minute Thanksgiving with loved ones on the gulf coast beaches in Florida. (Yes, it was sunny and wonderful, be jealous!) After a crazy few months it was amazing to leave my phone, my computer, my school work, and yes even softball at home and truly enjoy some time relaxing with my family. Actually that’s a lie, I did pitch on the beach with my 15-year-old sister, who happens to actually be a catcher. (Like Megan, the sister catching at Adelphi University…the family could only handle one pitcher!) BUT for twenty minutes there was no instruction, no pressure, and no expectations…it was purely fun and relaxing.
The moral to the story - everyone needs a break. From school, from softball, from everyday life and the stress that unfortunately so often comes with it. As adults, we need mental health days and time off around the holidays. THE SAME GOES FOR YOUR PLAYERS TOO. Part of the success of any athlete is being able to have time to miss the sport. By practicing and playing year round the thrill of the game begins to fade for many young athletes and it leads to the “burn out” factor occurring in younger and younger athletes. The days of the three sport athlete are quickly fading as sport specialization becomes the new thing. Growing up I was a three sport athlete (softball, basketball, and volleyball) until high school started, and after that I still ran indoor track and played softball. The expectations put on athletes in their travel ball programs makes it harder and harder for them to not only play other sports, but also to get a break and make memories outside of softball.
The following is a portion of the preseason workout packet that I put together for my collegiate pitchers this year. We start official preseason on January 11th and our season opener is February 4th. Even with our first games being so soon, I still think it will benefit us more as a staff to take the week off and give the girls time to enjoy being home with their friends and family.
12/19 - 12/25
“There is virtue in work, and there is virtue in rest. Use both and overlook neither.”
- Alan Cohen
OFF! Put your glove in the closet and enjoy time with your family. Give your body a break, but also mentally take a break, refocus next week and get to work!
So here is my plea - yes this is for you travel ball coaches! Give you players time off. Tell them to throw their gloves in the closet and leave it there for a few weeks. Give them time to enjoy Christmas and New Year’s with their friends and family just like you want to. 2 or 3 weeks of indoor practice will not make or break your season this year. In January when you start practicing again I can almost guarantee that your players will be excited and WANT to put in the work. Time away can be ten times more beneficial than practices with players going through the motions because they are burnt out and would rather be doing holiday activities. Time away from softball gives everyone involved - players, parents, and coaches - time to take care of themselves and then come back ready to dive into preseason head first. After spending a week relaxing with my family, I accomplished more in the past few days that I’ve been back than I ever imagined. I have new energy and excitement to get back to work. Give your girls the opportunity to have the same feeling about the sport they love!
The moral to the story - everyone needs a break. From school, from softball, from everyday life and the stress that unfortunately so often comes with it. As adults, we need mental health days and time off around the holidays. THE SAME GOES FOR YOUR PLAYERS TOO. Part of the success of any athlete is being able to have time to miss the sport. By practicing and playing year round the thrill of the game begins to fade for many young athletes and it leads to the “burn out” factor occurring in younger and younger athletes. The days of the three sport athlete are quickly fading as sport specialization becomes the new thing. Growing up I was a three sport athlete (softball, basketball, and volleyball) until high school started, and after that I still ran indoor track and played softball. The expectations put on athletes in their travel ball programs makes it harder and harder for them to not only play other sports, but also to get a break and make memories outside of softball.
The following is a portion of the preseason workout packet that I put together for my collegiate pitchers this year. We start official preseason on January 11th and our season opener is February 4th. Even with our first games being so soon, I still think it will benefit us more as a staff to take the week off and give the girls time to enjoy being home with their friends and family.
12/19 - 12/25
“There is virtue in work, and there is virtue in rest. Use both and overlook neither.”
- Alan Cohen
OFF! Put your glove in the closet and enjoy time with your family. Give your body a break, but also mentally take a break, refocus next week and get to work!
So here is my plea - yes this is for you travel ball coaches! Give you players time off. Tell them to throw their gloves in the closet and leave it there for a few weeks. Give them time to enjoy Christmas and New Year’s with their friends and family just like you want to. 2 or 3 weeks of indoor practice will not make or break your season this year. In January when you start practicing again I can almost guarantee that your players will be excited and WANT to put in the work. Time away can be ten times more beneficial than practices with players going through the motions because they are burnt out and would rather be doing holiday activities. Time away from softball gives everyone involved - players, parents, and coaches - time to take care of themselves and then come back ready to dive into preseason head first. After spending a week relaxing with my family, I accomplished more in the past few days that I’ve been back than I ever imagined. I have new energy and excitement to get back to work. Give your girls the opportunity to have the same feeling about the sport they love!
- Published on
Today we should have won, but we didn’t. It may have come down to one play, or maybe we just had a really bad game or day overall, but we should have won - we were the better team. On paper, everything said we would win…we were stronger, faster, more athletic - just better softball players than they were. We should have won.
This feeling is one of the worst, knowing that you should have won and walking home empty handed instead. BUT, I can almost guarantee that there are days that you and your team have walked away with a win against a stronger, faster, more athletic and just overall better team than yours. This is the beauty of softball - it is anyone’s game on any given day. It is nothing like football or lacrosse, where players go up one on one to try to out run, out tackle, or out score each other. Softball is not only about how well you gel as a team, but also how well you execute. Sometimes, a missed steal sign or a wild pitch can decide a game. Those who execute at the right time win. It’s that simple. Average teams beat great teams when they fail to execute and do the little things. Throughout your career you will be on both sides of this scenario, walking away from some games wondering how in the world you just lost and others wondering who had the four leaf clover in their cleat. Success is seen as earning a hit 3 out of 10 at bats. In a game where you can fail 7 times out of 10 and are still considered successful, you are guaranteed to have bad days. Sometimes you’ll hit the most perfect line drive right at the center fielder, and then next at bat you’ll hit a ridiculous pop fly that ends up in no man’s land behind first base for a single. Sometimes it really is about timing and luck.
It was 2007. We were in North Carolina playing for an NSA Eastern National Title with 128 teams. With 8 teams left we were knocked into the loser’s bracket and fought back to the championship game, needing to win two games to win it all against an undefeated Alabama team. Going into the 7th inning of game one we were behind 1-0. A slap up the middle, a bunt, and a perfectly placed single tied the game. We then went into extra innings to win the first game, ultimately winning the tournament in game two. In the span of one half inning, the entire course of the game had changed due to a perfectly timed execution. It was to no fault of the other team. They made the out to get the player who had bunted, and they fielded both the slap and the single in the outfield cleanly. We executed, and on that day - things went our way.
It was 2010. We were in Maryland playing for the ASA Eastern National Title with 85 teams. In the 5th inning we were tied with a team from South Carolina. I gave up a single to left field with runners on first and second. Our left fielder decided to dive for the ball instead of getting in front of it, and the ball ended up rolling to the fence. We ended up losing the game by one run. That play decided our fate and sent us home in 5th place that year.
In softball, it is anyone’s game on any given day. Some days we walk away winning when we probably shouldn’t have, and others we walk away losing when we did everything right. Yet, day after day we still find ourselves out on the field working towards perfection.
This feeling is one of the worst, knowing that you should have won and walking home empty handed instead. BUT, I can almost guarantee that there are days that you and your team have walked away with a win against a stronger, faster, more athletic and just overall better team than yours. This is the beauty of softball - it is anyone’s game on any given day. It is nothing like football or lacrosse, where players go up one on one to try to out run, out tackle, or out score each other. Softball is not only about how well you gel as a team, but also how well you execute. Sometimes, a missed steal sign or a wild pitch can decide a game. Those who execute at the right time win. It’s that simple. Average teams beat great teams when they fail to execute and do the little things. Throughout your career you will be on both sides of this scenario, walking away from some games wondering how in the world you just lost and others wondering who had the four leaf clover in their cleat. Success is seen as earning a hit 3 out of 10 at bats. In a game where you can fail 7 times out of 10 and are still considered successful, you are guaranteed to have bad days. Sometimes you’ll hit the most perfect line drive right at the center fielder, and then next at bat you’ll hit a ridiculous pop fly that ends up in no man’s land behind first base for a single. Sometimes it really is about timing and luck.
It was 2007. We were in North Carolina playing for an NSA Eastern National Title with 128 teams. With 8 teams left we were knocked into the loser’s bracket and fought back to the championship game, needing to win two games to win it all against an undefeated Alabama team. Going into the 7th inning of game one we were behind 1-0. A slap up the middle, a bunt, and a perfectly placed single tied the game. We then went into extra innings to win the first game, ultimately winning the tournament in game two. In the span of one half inning, the entire course of the game had changed due to a perfectly timed execution. It was to no fault of the other team. They made the out to get the player who had bunted, and they fielded both the slap and the single in the outfield cleanly. We executed, and on that day - things went our way.
It was 2010. We were in Maryland playing for the ASA Eastern National Title with 85 teams. In the 5th inning we were tied with a team from South Carolina. I gave up a single to left field with runners on first and second. Our left fielder decided to dive for the ball instead of getting in front of it, and the ball ended up rolling to the fence. We ended up losing the game by one run. That play decided our fate and sent us home in 5th place that year.
In softball, it is anyone’s game on any given day. Some days we walk away winning when we probably shouldn’t have, and others we walk away losing when we did everything right. Yet, day after day we still find ourselves out on the field working towards perfection.
- Published on
Coach Lewis,
My name is --------- and I am attending the Headfirst Honor Roll Camp on 10/22-10/23. I am looking to study ------- and your softball program interests me as well. I have a ----- GPA and I have been playing softball for ten years. I play for ------ team, take hitting lessons from ---------, and play high school softball for ----------. I hope that you take a look at me this weekend, and I would love to hear from you. Thanks!
I spent the past weekend recruiting with Rhodes College Softball at the Headfirst Honor Roll Camp in DC. Leading up to the event I received about thirty emails exactly like the one you just read. After about 5 of the same email, they all start to blend together. Until I got this one. While it is somewhat silly and does not give me a lot of information about the player or her interest level in Rhodes, it caught my attention enough to want to meet her. What little things can you do to stand out like this when there are thousands of softball players around the country doing the exact same things you are?
Hi Coach Lewis,
My name is ----------, and I go to --------- High School. My plan is to study biology and wear wools socks to class while doing so. In --------- it is perpetually oven-temperature, so I am seeking a school like Rhodes where that is not always the case and my dream can become a reality. Knee-high socks are also fine by me, so long as they are accompanied by a bat and a glove. While said attire is being worn, I play left field and hit/slap on the left side.
I will be at the Headfirst Honor Roll camp in DC this weekend, and I look forward to meeting you there. If you have any spots available for 2017's, please keep your eyes peeled for me. Even if you don't, I occasionally provide visual entertainment in the form of stellar dance moves and I'd love to talk to you all about it...or anything else possibly more relevant to your desired conversation for the scenario. See you this weekend!
My name is --------- and I am attending the Headfirst Honor Roll Camp on 10/22-10/23. I am looking to study ------- and your softball program interests me as well. I have a ----- GPA and I have been playing softball for ten years. I play for ------ team, take hitting lessons from ---------, and play high school softball for ----------. I hope that you take a look at me this weekend, and I would love to hear from you. Thanks!
I spent the past weekend recruiting with Rhodes College Softball at the Headfirst Honor Roll Camp in DC. Leading up to the event I received about thirty emails exactly like the one you just read. After about 5 of the same email, they all start to blend together. Until I got this one. While it is somewhat silly and does not give me a lot of information about the player or her interest level in Rhodes, it caught my attention enough to want to meet her. What little things can you do to stand out like this when there are thousands of softball players around the country doing the exact same things you are?
Hi Coach Lewis,
My name is ----------, and I go to --------- High School. My plan is to study biology and wear wools socks to class while doing so. In --------- it is perpetually oven-temperature, so I am seeking a school like Rhodes where that is not always the case and my dream can become a reality. Knee-high socks are also fine by me, so long as they are accompanied by a bat and a glove. While said attire is being worn, I play left field and hit/slap on the left side.
I will be at the Headfirst Honor Roll camp in DC this weekend, and I look forward to meeting you there. If you have any spots available for 2017's, please keep your eyes peeled for me. Even if you don't, I occasionally provide visual entertainment in the form of stellar dance moves and I'd love to talk to you all about it...or anything else possibly more relevant to your desired conversation for the scenario. See you this weekend!
- Published on
I try to create the same expectations and environment for young pitchers that I do for college pitchers. It's never too early to start asking pitchers to take ownership of their actions!
1. Developing intrinsic motivation
Being a pitcher means putting in more time than any other position on the field. Especially when you are young and first learning to pitch, because we all know the amount of practice it takes to actually learn how to throw strikes is insane. It takes a special kind of softball player to continue to do something over and over with little progress at first. This intrinsic motivation doesn’t just happen, it must be encouraged by coaches, parents, and even teammates. I try to give my young pitchers drills and activities that they can do WITHOUT a catcher at home to create correct muscle memory. At first, young pitchers need gentle reminders from parents (and myself!) that they need to be doing these drills to get better. The goal is that as they begin to do their drills more at home they realize that the drills truly are benefiting them and will want to continue to do them on their own. This in turn creates intrinsic motivation for young pitchers.
2. Responsibility
Developing responsibility at a young age is so important. It’s one of my favorite life lessons to teach as a coach. With my older pitchers, my expectations are obviously much higher than my younger pitchers. The expectations are still there though. It is your job to be prepared coming to a lesson. Water? Cleats? Glove? All things that YOU need to complete the lesson - not things that Mom or Dad need. Just like it is your job to be prepared for a weekend of games. It is not anyone’s job but your own to make sure you have enough to eat and drink, carry your equipment to and from the field, or talk to your coach when conversations need to occur.
3. Time Management
The time management I developed at a young age balancing school, softball, friends, and other activities is 100% the reason that I am as successful as I am balancing everything in my life as an adult. The precedent was set by my parents that if my homework wasn’t done there would be no practice that night. It only took one missed practice to guarantee it would never happen again. I quickly learned to manage my own time, which is something that benefited me all through college and still does today balancing a crazy schedule. Often times pitchers make excuses for why they couldn’t find time to work during the week. Prioritizing pitching in your schedule results in getting better - watching 8 episodes of Grey’s Anatomy does not. (Much like those 8 hours of Grey’s Anatomy will take away from your academic performance as well!)
4. Communication
I expect to talk to the pitcher, not the parent! This is easy with college pitchers with their parents generally being hours away from our bullpens. I encourage my younger pitchers to talk to me about their weekends. What worked, what didn’t, what we need to work on. I understand that this isn’t an easy thing to do at 10, 12, even 16 sometimes. The more you take ownership of your pitching performances and conversations about them the more you understand your style and what you need to work on! Another life lesson - parents are not always there to support you and answer for you, eventually we have to grow up! The support from your parents is amazing, but you need to talk about your own experiences to allow yourself to continue to grow…speak for yourself!
5. Self-Reflection
We should be evaluating ourselves after every weekend. What worked, what didn’t, what mentality did you have, what do you need to change before stepping on the mound again? The earlier pitchers start to evaluate themselves the better their softball IQ becomes. So often I ask my young pitchers how their weekend went or how they pitched at practice over the last week and they immediately look to their parents. I want to hear from YOU about how YOU pitched, you were the only one in the circle! Asking mom and dad for their opinions is important, but I want to know what you’re proud of, what you want to work on, or what’s been frustrating lately. The first step to getting better is knowing what you need to work on!
6. Discussions about WHY pitches are or aren’t working
It is so easy for me to sit on my bucket at a bullpen and spit out mechanical adjustments to make based on what I see you do. (It’s also quite boring to do that three or four hours straight, if I’m being honest.) With most of you we work for one hour a week, which compared to the amount of time in a week you play softball is almost nothing. In that one hour a week we have to figure out how to help you succeed ALL of the time, just not when I’m there helping you make adjustments. By talking through what you felt, how you moved, or how you spun the ball you can begin to understand your body more and make adjustments on your own without me. It is never too early to begin to understand your strengths, weaknesses, and what you need to focus on when there isn’t a coach there to tell you.
7. Giving Pitchers Ownership
I come into every bullpen I work with a plan (It’s part of my OCD pitcher personality, I just can’t help it). BUT that plan is always flexible. Pitchers learn more and get more out of a bullpen, no matter their age, when they feel ownership over what they are working on. It is their career and their success so after conversations at the beginning of bullpens I reevaluate what the focus of the bullpen should be. Sometimes it’s pretty spot on to what I had originally planned, and sometimes we pull something out of left field to work on. In the end, giving the pitcher ownership over what they think they need to work on creates an environment where they not only are excited to work but also feel they are working towards their goals.
1. Developing intrinsic motivation
Being a pitcher means putting in more time than any other position on the field. Especially when you are young and first learning to pitch, because we all know the amount of practice it takes to actually learn how to throw strikes is insane. It takes a special kind of softball player to continue to do something over and over with little progress at first. This intrinsic motivation doesn’t just happen, it must be encouraged by coaches, parents, and even teammates. I try to give my young pitchers drills and activities that they can do WITHOUT a catcher at home to create correct muscle memory. At first, young pitchers need gentle reminders from parents (and myself!) that they need to be doing these drills to get better. The goal is that as they begin to do their drills more at home they realize that the drills truly are benefiting them and will want to continue to do them on their own. This in turn creates intrinsic motivation for young pitchers.
2. Responsibility
Developing responsibility at a young age is so important. It’s one of my favorite life lessons to teach as a coach. With my older pitchers, my expectations are obviously much higher than my younger pitchers. The expectations are still there though. It is your job to be prepared coming to a lesson. Water? Cleats? Glove? All things that YOU need to complete the lesson - not things that Mom or Dad need. Just like it is your job to be prepared for a weekend of games. It is not anyone’s job but your own to make sure you have enough to eat and drink, carry your equipment to and from the field, or talk to your coach when conversations need to occur.
3. Time Management
The time management I developed at a young age balancing school, softball, friends, and other activities is 100% the reason that I am as successful as I am balancing everything in my life as an adult. The precedent was set by my parents that if my homework wasn’t done there would be no practice that night. It only took one missed practice to guarantee it would never happen again. I quickly learned to manage my own time, which is something that benefited me all through college and still does today balancing a crazy schedule. Often times pitchers make excuses for why they couldn’t find time to work during the week. Prioritizing pitching in your schedule results in getting better - watching 8 episodes of Grey’s Anatomy does not. (Much like those 8 hours of Grey’s Anatomy will take away from your academic performance as well!)
4. Communication
I expect to talk to the pitcher, not the parent! This is easy with college pitchers with their parents generally being hours away from our bullpens. I encourage my younger pitchers to talk to me about their weekends. What worked, what didn’t, what we need to work on. I understand that this isn’t an easy thing to do at 10, 12, even 16 sometimes. The more you take ownership of your pitching performances and conversations about them the more you understand your style and what you need to work on! Another life lesson - parents are not always there to support you and answer for you, eventually we have to grow up! The support from your parents is amazing, but you need to talk about your own experiences to allow yourself to continue to grow…speak for yourself!
5. Self-Reflection
We should be evaluating ourselves after every weekend. What worked, what didn’t, what mentality did you have, what do you need to change before stepping on the mound again? The earlier pitchers start to evaluate themselves the better their softball IQ becomes. So often I ask my young pitchers how their weekend went or how they pitched at practice over the last week and they immediately look to their parents. I want to hear from YOU about how YOU pitched, you were the only one in the circle! Asking mom and dad for their opinions is important, but I want to know what you’re proud of, what you want to work on, or what’s been frustrating lately. The first step to getting better is knowing what you need to work on!
6. Discussions about WHY pitches are or aren’t working
It is so easy for me to sit on my bucket at a bullpen and spit out mechanical adjustments to make based on what I see you do. (It’s also quite boring to do that three or four hours straight, if I’m being honest.) With most of you we work for one hour a week, which compared to the amount of time in a week you play softball is almost nothing. In that one hour a week we have to figure out how to help you succeed ALL of the time, just not when I’m there helping you make adjustments. By talking through what you felt, how you moved, or how you spun the ball you can begin to understand your body more and make adjustments on your own without me. It is never too early to begin to understand your strengths, weaknesses, and what you need to focus on when there isn’t a coach there to tell you.
7. Giving Pitchers Ownership
I come into every bullpen I work with a plan (It’s part of my OCD pitcher personality, I just can’t help it). BUT that plan is always flexible. Pitchers learn more and get more out of a bullpen, no matter their age, when they feel ownership over what they are working on. It is their career and their success so after conversations at the beginning of bullpens I reevaluate what the focus of the bullpen should be. Sometimes it’s pretty spot on to what I had originally planned, and sometimes we pull something out of left field to work on. In the end, giving the pitcher ownership over what they think they need to work on creates an environment where they not only are excited to work but also feel they are working towards their goals.
- Published on
Change is a funny thing; we always hate it so much while it is happening and then look back realizing it was exactly what we needed to become a better version of ourselves. I got to college as a freshman, and was told everything I had been taught my entire life was wrong - the way I held the ball, the way I snapped, the way I dragged my foot, the way I finished my pitch. Literally almost everything. By the time my family got to see me pitch at the end of the fall season, I didn’t even look like the pitcher they had sent away to college just a few months earlier. It was absolutely the most difficult time of my career. I lost my identity as a pitcher, I lost my love for going to practice every day, but worst of all I lost my confidence.
I understand the philosophy. Break a pitcher down and build her back up to get her to buy into “it”. You break her to get her to mold into what the program wants her to be. BUT why does there have to only be one way to do things? What if multiple ways can be successful? For example - look at the “figure four” versus the “open and close the door” debate. (A “figure four” motion leaves the hips completely open at the end of the pitch with the foot up the in air like a four. An “open and close the door” motion closes the hips at the end after the pitcher releases the ball.) There are pitchers on the national and international stage who are extremely successful using both philosophies. So why change it if it isn’t broken?
Going through this experience as a collegiate pitcher has made a huge impact on who I am today as a coach. I feel like I say over and over again that my job isn’t to reinvent the wheel. Whether I’m working as a private pitching coach with my young students or with my collegiate pitchers, it’s the same concept. If you can show me that the way you are doing something not only works, but works consistently and is successful then why would I change it? Your definition of consistency and success may be different than mine though.
When changing things, sometimes it is hard to see the big picture. You may have to take a step backwards to then take three steps forward. Anything we try that is new might not be amazing at the first few times we try it. As pitchers we often fail to see the big picture when changing a pitch or mechanic. We get stuck in the mindset of “it worked better before I changed it so I’m going to fight the change to get better.” I do not ask my pitchers to change things just because I want them doing it “my way.” Often times, if you can make the change and develop the muscle memory, the pitch becomes much more effective than it previously was. There is always a method to the madness.
Before you can truly be successful when changing things, you must buy in to then see the results. This becomes the tricky part due to the fact that as human beings we are result oriented. We want to “see it to believe it.” This is part of becoming a mentally tough pitcher, you have to believe in it to see results.
I understand the philosophy. Break a pitcher down and build her back up to get her to buy into “it”. You break her to get her to mold into what the program wants her to be. BUT why does there have to only be one way to do things? What if multiple ways can be successful? For example - look at the “figure four” versus the “open and close the door” debate. (A “figure four” motion leaves the hips completely open at the end of the pitch with the foot up the in air like a four. An “open and close the door” motion closes the hips at the end after the pitcher releases the ball.) There are pitchers on the national and international stage who are extremely successful using both philosophies. So why change it if it isn’t broken?
Going through this experience as a collegiate pitcher has made a huge impact on who I am today as a coach. I feel like I say over and over again that my job isn’t to reinvent the wheel. Whether I’m working as a private pitching coach with my young students or with my collegiate pitchers, it’s the same concept. If you can show me that the way you are doing something not only works, but works consistently and is successful then why would I change it? Your definition of consistency and success may be different than mine though.
When changing things, sometimes it is hard to see the big picture. You may have to take a step backwards to then take three steps forward. Anything we try that is new might not be amazing at the first few times we try it. As pitchers we often fail to see the big picture when changing a pitch or mechanic. We get stuck in the mindset of “it worked better before I changed it so I’m going to fight the change to get better.” I do not ask my pitchers to change things just because I want them doing it “my way.” Often times, if you can make the change and develop the muscle memory, the pitch becomes much more effective than it previously was. There is always a method to the madness.
Before you can truly be successful when changing things, you must buy in to then see the results. This becomes the tricky part due to the fact that as human beings we are result oriented. We want to “see it to believe it.” This is part of becoming a mentally tough pitcher, you have to believe in it to see results.
- Published on
In the era of the helicopter and the lawnmower parent how can you support your daughter through the recruiting process without hurting her chances of an offer from schools? Yes, it is not just your daughter that is being looked at for her talent, academics, and personality but also whether or not her family will add value to the culture of the program. How can you be supportive while letting your daughter run the show? How can you show a college coach that you will be a positive part of their program?
Emailing coaches: The responsibility of emailing college coaches before and after tournaments is your daughters. She will need guidance and an editor while she writes the email, but it needs to come from her account with her name at the bottom. If I receive an email from a parent on their daughter’s behalf it shows me right away where I am on that player’s list of priorities. If the player does not have the time to write me an email, then I will not waste my time writing “her” or her parents back.
Going on Recruiting Visits:
1. Let your daughter take the lead. As a parent you need take a back seat role the entire visit. She is the one looking to go to the school and be a part of the program. She needs your support, but also needs the opportunity to get to know the coach and school.
2. I am willing to bet A LOT of money that near the end of the visit the coach will ask you as the parent if you have any questions. Try your best to save your questions until then so your daughter can really take in the experience. With your questions, try to focus on the school itself and not the softball program. Safety, academic support for athletes, and life on campus are all great questions for parents to ask. Let your daughter focus on the softball questions. If the coach is thinking about scholarship money they will bring it up. If you bring up money, it makes you look like a mercenary.
3. Do all the research you can on the school before you go on the visit - number of students, the city the school is located in, academic majors, etcetera. This helps to limit the amount of questions you ask on the visit to information you cannot get from other sources and allows you to focus on questions that come up during the visit.
4. Coaches judge you based on your family interaction. It’s a little harsh, but also the truth. How does your daughter interact with you? Does she look at you to answer all of the questions they ask? Does she struggle to come up with her own questions throughout the visit? A coach will look for how much she relies on you to function throughout the day. In the same sense, every time your daughter opens her mouth to say something are you cutting her off and talking for her? (Side note...as a pitching coach once my pitchers turn 10 I expect them to be the one contacting me to talk about how they pitched over the weekend or discussing it with me the next lesson NOT their parents. Your 17-18 year old should be able to speak for themselves!!)
5. Yes, your daughter is being recruited - but with her comes the package deal of her family. How will your family represent the school and program once your daughter is a part of it? Will you negatively represent when you wear “_______ softball” shirts or when you talk about your daughter playing at “_______ school?” When a coach makes an in game decision will you be supportive or will you be the parent in the stands running your mouth? A college softball team is a family, and when your daughter becomes part of the family you do as well. If you are going to represent that family poorly a coach will second guess welcoming you into it.
6. Not every visit is going to be amazing. My parents and I visited one school where the second I stepped on campus I knew it wasn’t for me, we then went through the motions of the visit and I later emailed the coach thanking them for their time and explaining that their school just wasn’t for me. There is nothing wrong with that! Sometimes your daughter will just know it isn’t the right fit for her. Be respectful of the coach’s time and be sure to help your daughter send them an email that is polite, respectful, and honest.
7. Support your daughter after the visit! Sit down with her and create a list of things she loved about the school and things she didn’t soon after you leave the school. When the time comes for her to make a decision between two or three schools the notes she has from right after the visit will help her make the decision. Having the “little things” about each school written down that she may have forgotten as visits begin to flow together can help with the decision making process!
Parents play a large role in who we are as young ladies, students, and athletes. The guidance you offer your daughter throughout her recruiting process is huge!
Emailing coaches: The responsibility of emailing college coaches before and after tournaments is your daughters. She will need guidance and an editor while she writes the email, but it needs to come from her account with her name at the bottom. If I receive an email from a parent on their daughter’s behalf it shows me right away where I am on that player’s list of priorities. If the player does not have the time to write me an email, then I will not waste my time writing “her” or her parents back.
Going on Recruiting Visits:
1. Let your daughter take the lead. As a parent you need take a back seat role the entire visit. She is the one looking to go to the school and be a part of the program. She needs your support, but also needs the opportunity to get to know the coach and school.
2. I am willing to bet A LOT of money that near the end of the visit the coach will ask you as the parent if you have any questions. Try your best to save your questions until then so your daughter can really take in the experience. With your questions, try to focus on the school itself and not the softball program. Safety, academic support for athletes, and life on campus are all great questions for parents to ask. Let your daughter focus on the softball questions. If the coach is thinking about scholarship money they will bring it up. If you bring up money, it makes you look like a mercenary.
3. Do all the research you can on the school before you go on the visit - number of students, the city the school is located in, academic majors, etcetera. This helps to limit the amount of questions you ask on the visit to information you cannot get from other sources and allows you to focus on questions that come up during the visit.
4. Coaches judge you based on your family interaction. It’s a little harsh, but also the truth. How does your daughter interact with you? Does she look at you to answer all of the questions they ask? Does she struggle to come up with her own questions throughout the visit? A coach will look for how much she relies on you to function throughout the day. In the same sense, every time your daughter opens her mouth to say something are you cutting her off and talking for her? (Side note...as a pitching coach once my pitchers turn 10 I expect them to be the one contacting me to talk about how they pitched over the weekend or discussing it with me the next lesson NOT their parents. Your 17-18 year old should be able to speak for themselves!!)
5. Yes, your daughter is being recruited - but with her comes the package deal of her family. How will your family represent the school and program once your daughter is a part of it? Will you negatively represent when you wear “_______ softball” shirts or when you talk about your daughter playing at “_______ school?” When a coach makes an in game decision will you be supportive or will you be the parent in the stands running your mouth? A college softball team is a family, and when your daughter becomes part of the family you do as well. If you are going to represent that family poorly a coach will second guess welcoming you into it.
6. Not every visit is going to be amazing. My parents and I visited one school where the second I stepped on campus I knew it wasn’t for me, we then went through the motions of the visit and I later emailed the coach thanking them for their time and explaining that their school just wasn’t for me. There is nothing wrong with that! Sometimes your daughter will just know it isn’t the right fit for her. Be respectful of the coach’s time and be sure to help your daughter send them an email that is polite, respectful, and honest.
7. Support your daughter after the visit! Sit down with her and create a list of things she loved about the school and things she didn’t soon after you leave the school. When the time comes for her to make a decision between two or three schools the notes she has from right after the visit will help her make the decision. Having the “little things” about each school written down that she may have forgotten as visits begin to flow together can help with the decision making process!
Parents play a large role in who we are as young ladies, students, and athletes. The guidance you offer your daughter throughout her recruiting process is huge!
- Published on
I hope you all are enjoying your first few days back for the school year. Don’t wish the year away, it’ll be gone before you know it! There are a few stories I would like to share (and reminisce a little about the days that I hated going back to school and now miss).
1. The random things you learn and then ask “When am I ever going to use this in real life?”
Trust me, it might not actually matter what geometry proof does what or who conquered what dynasty in China at what time. BUT it does help you make connections with people. So, story time. 7 years ago (yikes, 7 years) I was a sophomore in high school starting to get recruited. I was talking a good bit to the assistant coach at Holy Cross College in Massachusetts. It turns out that he was a history teacher before he became a softball coach. Well, I was taking two history classes at the time. Part of the connection I made to that coach was being able to talk about history intelligently - it made me more memorable than a player he only talked about softball with. I then, 7 years later, email said coach saying “Hey, I’m Quincy Lewis - the lefty with the drop ball that loves history too - can I have some advice on how to get into coaching.” Coach Wagner then asks for my resume and offers me a job at the college he is the head coach at. It isn’t always just who you know, sometimes it’s what you know too!
2. YOU ARE GOING TO SCHOOL FOR FREE. This may seem silly to you right now, but someday you’ll get it. You only have so long to go to school and learn new things, socialize, play sports, be in Spanish club, be a techie in the play, to do those fun high school memory making things. I mean, let’s be real - I just spent close to $500 on TEXTBOOKS for ½ a year. Take advantage of all the things you are given the opportunity to do outside of softball! Even something as small as helping with a donation table during lunch can lead to lasting friendships and experiences.
3. TIME MANAGEMENT!!!!!! You will appreciate learning this now for THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. You are an athlete - this generally means you have practice at least two days a week and are playing weekends…and some of you are playing fall high school sports as well! I can’t count the amount of times I was doing homework in the car on my way home from a tournament at midnight on a Sunday. Take the time to plan ahead and get things done early. No one wants to be in a hotel with your team doing homework on Saturday night that you could have done on Thursday night instead of watching Grey’s Anatomy! I’m thankful every day that my parents helped me create great time management habits, because it now allows me to juggle the craziness that is my life as an almost adult!
4. A “full ride” scholarship can be deceiving. Yes, full ride means that you go to school for free, but it DOES NOT mean that your bills are completely covered by athletic scholarship. There are SO MANY SCHOOLS with such a small number of scholarships for a team of 20+ players. Coaches look for smart kids! A player with a good GPA will earn more academic aid, which means less money comes out of that coach’s recruiting budget but the player still receives the same amount of aid overall. This is especially common at upper level DII schools. If you are looking to play DIII ALL of the money you will receive is based on your academic performance and SAT/ACT scores. My own “full ride” was only 2/3 athletic and the rest was covered by academic aid based on my high school performance.
5. These years will be some of the last that you can really focus on what you WANT to do, and not necessarily what you NEED to do. Take advantage of the fact that your parents are supporting you by giving you the opportunity to do what you love and figure out who you want to be. Take it from someone who hasn’t lived “at home” in two years. Yes, I get to do what I love, but there are so many other factors now that I don’t live with my support system. The extra responsibilities of living on my own, being in school, and working sometimes create situations where what I want to do is trumped by what I need to do. Take the time to enjoy the freedom to do what you want while you can!
I wish everyone great teachers, little drama, and lots of memories this year! Have a great one!
1. The random things you learn and then ask “When am I ever going to use this in real life?”
Trust me, it might not actually matter what geometry proof does what or who conquered what dynasty in China at what time. BUT it does help you make connections with people. So, story time. 7 years ago (yikes, 7 years) I was a sophomore in high school starting to get recruited. I was talking a good bit to the assistant coach at Holy Cross College in Massachusetts. It turns out that he was a history teacher before he became a softball coach. Well, I was taking two history classes at the time. Part of the connection I made to that coach was being able to talk about history intelligently - it made me more memorable than a player he only talked about softball with. I then, 7 years later, email said coach saying “Hey, I’m Quincy Lewis - the lefty with the drop ball that loves history too - can I have some advice on how to get into coaching.” Coach Wagner then asks for my resume and offers me a job at the college he is the head coach at. It isn’t always just who you know, sometimes it’s what you know too!
2. YOU ARE GOING TO SCHOOL FOR FREE. This may seem silly to you right now, but someday you’ll get it. You only have so long to go to school and learn new things, socialize, play sports, be in Spanish club, be a techie in the play, to do those fun high school memory making things. I mean, let’s be real - I just spent close to $500 on TEXTBOOKS for ½ a year. Take advantage of all the things you are given the opportunity to do outside of softball! Even something as small as helping with a donation table during lunch can lead to lasting friendships and experiences.
3. TIME MANAGEMENT!!!!!! You will appreciate learning this now for THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. You are an athlete - this generally means you have practice at least two days a week and are playing weekends…and some of you are playing fall high school sports as well! I can’t count the amount of times I was doing homework in the car on my way home from a tournament at midnight on a Sunday. Take the time to plan ahead and get things done early. No one wants to be in a hotel with your team doing homework on Saturday night that you could have done on Thursday night instead of watching Grey’s Anatomy! I’m thankful every day that my parents helped me create great time management habits, because it now allows me to juggle the craziness that is my life as an almost adult!
4. A “full ride” scholarship can be deceiving. Yes, full ride means that you go to school for free, but it DOES NOT mean that your bills are completely covered by athletic scholarship. There are SO MANY SCHOOLS with such a small number of scholarships for a team of 20+ players. Coaches look for smart kids! A player with a good GPA will earn more academic aid, which means less money comes out of that coach’s recruiting budget but the player still receives the same amount of aid overall. This is especially common at upper level DII schools. If you are looking to play DIII ALL of the money you will receive is based on your academic performance and SAT/ACT scores. My own “full ride” was only 2/3 athletic and the rest was covered by academic aid based on my high school performance.
5. These years will be some of the last that you can really focus on what you WANT to do, and not necessarily what you NEED to do. Take advantage of the fact that your parents are supporting you by giving you the opportunity to do what you love and figure out who you want to be. Take it from someone who hasn’t lived “at home” in two years. Yes, I get to do what I love, but there are so many other factors now that I don’t live with my support system. The extra responsibilities of living on my own, being in school, and working sometimes create situations where what I want to do is trumped by what I need to do. Take the time to enjoy the freedom to do what you want while you can!
I wish everyone great teachers, little drama, and lots of memories this year! Have a great one!